Avant Squares was the first time I fell madly in love with the sound of the band, rather than just madly in love with playing in a band. The early 1980s was an exciting time in the East Village. I started playing drums, a trap set. That's me on the left, Mike Sappol -- most incredible guitar player I ever met -- his guitar sounded like a festival of impossible notes -- Mike in the middle. And on the right is the maddening, beautiul Chassler, who'd never held a bass before in his life. We practiced six nights a week for two years. One of my favorite songs of ours was our "rap" song. Mike and I would hold a rap beat while Chassler rapped (Chassler style) on George Elliot, Nietzsche, or some such. Makes me chuckle just thinking about it. Unfortunately, not much evidence exists of our efforts. We mostly played downtown New York clubs, and went to the One World Poetry Festival in Amsterdam in the early 80s.

Chassler was my philosophy teacher in college in Chicago. We fell in love. He was the most intimate lover I ever had. I'm not talking about my body. Any lover can get intimate with one's body if they're paying attention at all. I mean intimate with my head. He's the only lover who always, always got me. He was the only lover I ever had who felt total honesty was the only way to not make the world any murkier than it already was. He was also the only lover who had read all the feminist theory literature, and understood feminism on the deep levels that most men (and a lot of women) just do not have a clue about. Because of the careful way he thought through things, and his honesty, I could always count on him to respond to the world and me with the highest integrity and sincerety of heart. That's so rare in this world, and it's sad that it is. I've missed that precious quality in all my other relationships since him. He died in the early 21st Century, 2002. I only wish he had gotten himself as deeply as he got me.

Here's me doing one of my Squares songs, Chicks, acapella at a big poetry event at The Poetry Project, then Chass and I doing So Fine at the same event, Chass in falsetto.